A Tantrum Observed

For a long time I wrote very little, while other things took place, lessons were learnt. For some reason I was not in the mood to write it down. I missed it as it makes my day when I write a piece, no matter how short it may be. Later I was busy working on my book and that took up weeks, only to go on ice while I soak up still more experiences to give substance to the book which is very much experiential non-fiction and so cannot simply be researched and run off quickly.

A Tantrum Observed

I start with these words, hoping to trigger something profound from within to lift my spirit and engage me. Lost, with nothing to do other than wander and fill my time with inconsequential things, I let my mind do the wandering now I am sat here, iced coffee in hand.

There’s no forcing things to do and, as my ego throws a tantrum and fidgets at its immense discomfort at the void, I seek the grounding solace of trees to contain my unsettled mind. The frustration it betrays flows from its annoyance at its lack of control, its utter powerlessness, attempting to force action and conclusions from its disquieting dilemmas. It jumps back and forth, resisting surrender and the acceptance of the truth, like a spoilt child that never grows up, a sort of ugly Peter Pan.

But, as it fights, I can now observe its struggle for what it is and thereby transcend the meaningless resistance, watching its powerless flailings fade away bit by bit and in its place a tender, loving state of inner peace slowly ensues and once again the sun begins to shine inside my heart and from there to a myriad different places.

Perfection now surrounds me, inside and out, the perfection in nature, in life, in everything, apparent flaws being nothing more than fleeting aspects of an ever-changing, wonderful universe.