As I busy myself with my blog and videos, I find myself neglecting the source of the whole concept, indeed the source of everything, the universal consciousness, and I miss it, that loving connection, that protective reassurance that nevertheless leaves me free, free to err or follow its gentle but firm guidance though only doing what feels right in the moment.
I also notice myself looking for what “I should be doing next” and to “fit things in”, forgetting that time is not an issue and that I will only ever need to do what I can when it feels right to achieve what I want. Forcing myself, driving myself out of an old habit pattern born of an insidious guilt taught at homes and schools throughout most of the world, will only further alienate me from the best route for me and from the source of that inner wisdom.
So, I reign in my rampant thoughts given power by my ego, still ever willing to step back into an unsuitable role as leader and mentor, and as I let go and feel peace return to my body, my chest relaxes and breathing eases again. I know now that the first signs of stress or anxiety are signs and symptoms of losing my connection with that inner self plugged directly into the universe and of the return of the ego whose excited, uncontrolled leap back into the driving seat reminds me of the boundless excesses and mischief of my new beloved puppy, “Lucky”, who, if allowed to reign uncontrolled, would no doubt dominate my life.
Therefore, the ability to return myself to that state of peace depends upon noticing those signs and symptoms and stopping to reflect and allow my connection with the universe to be restored so that all is well with my world once more.
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